THE WARRIOR'S CODE

Where have all the Bill Werbenuiks gone?

‘Pot the red and screw back, For the yellow, green, brown, blue, pink and black…’ Chas & Dave

‘WHO’S the No.1 ranked snooker player in the world?’ The Derry News editor is a man of few words. If he’s not churning out the big news stories of the day he’s busy navigating the paper through the choppy and treacherous waters that is print media. But every so often he sprinkles a little magic dust into the air and the office bristles with excitement. ‘John Higgins’ belted out the deputy editor, well off target. I was surprised he didn’t say Alex Higgins. Higgins isn’t even in the top 10. Matthew Stevens’ name was blurted out from Sports Corner in the office. He’s ranked 28. ‘Judd Trump’ I countered, although I’m half thinking he’s a country and western singer. He IS a snooker player - somebody googled him. But he’s not the No.1, he’s No.7. The top ranked snooker player in the world is Mark Selby. I hadn’t heard of him either. Selby is closely followed by a man going by the name of Stuart Bingham. Really? The Australian Neil Roberston is No. 3, with China’s Ding Junhui fourth. Where the buck is Ronnie O’Sullivan, I hear you shout? Settle down at the back, the great man is ranked in fifth place. At least we’ve all heard of him. Have a look at the top 20 from 30 years ago and I bet you know most of those players.

Gladiators of the green baize

Gone are the days when snooker players were household names. Dennis Taylor defeated Steve Davis in the 1985 Embassy snooker final.That match attracted an audience of 18.5 million after midnight on a Sunday night. It’s the biggest audience BBC Two has ever had. It is difficult to imagine snooker ever reaching those heady heights again. Today the final is more likely to scrape around the 5 million mark. And it is steadily declining. Thirty years on from that epic final, snooker clubs are closing and the number of people over the age of 16 playing the game has more than halved in the last ten years. What has caused snooker’s slump in the UK and Ireland? Firstly, the majority of today’s players are personality vacuums. The best player in the world, probably ever, Ronnie O’Sullivan nailed it when he said after banking the £300, 000 winners cheque a couple of years ago. “What you are lacking is someone that adds a bit of pizzazz, every sport needs someone like your Alex Higgins or your Eric Cantona, a real character.” O’Sullivan, as mad as a bag of spanners himself, is the exception to prove the rule. Apart from Ronnie O’Sullivan there are absolutely no characters whatsoever. Back in the 1980s you couldn’t move for them. There was Steve ‘Interesting’ Davis, Kirk Stevens - the white-suited Canadian with the Coke habit and Alex ‘Hurricane’ Higgins, the Irish legend who ticked every box for bad behaviour. Jimmy ‘the whirlwind’ White would light up a Benson & Hedges then compile a break of hundred in the midst of the cigarette reek, sipping the gin and tonics for good measure. Even the Canadian, Cliff Thorburn who memorably compiled the first 147 at the world championships, had a great nickname – ‘the Grinder’. There was Tony Knowles, the Bolton lad whose prowess with the ladies kept the tabloids busy. One of my all-time favourite sporting moments was when Tony Knowles, slightly passed his best, appeared on Superstars. Bravely he opted to compete in the swimming event and I’ll never forget the sight of Knowles belly-flopping into the pool in his budgie-smugglers. But I digress. Best of all was big Bill Werbeniuk. Where have all the Bill Werbeniuks gone? If you tried to describe the rotund Canadian to someone under 25 years of age they would think you were describing someone from the Fast Show. (Would an under 25 even know the Fast Show? Jeez, I forget how old I am.) Jimmy White said of him when he died in 2003: “He was a great drinker but also a very good player. Only Bill could get tanked up with 10 pints before a match and still win.” A larger-than-life character, ‘Big Bill’ claimed that a hereditary tremor in his arm meant he had to imbibe huge quantities of booze before a game to stop his arm shaking. Makes perfect sense to me. Before his last professional match in 1990, he said: “I’ve had 24 pints of extra strong lager and eight double vodkas and I’m still not drunk.” He didn’t win. While playing in the 1980 World Team Cup challenge, Werbeniuk’s 20-stone bulk was so substantial that he managed to split his trousers, live on BBC television. But the drinking and smoking has all gone. And with that the characters and the viewing figures have dwindled too. In an era with a thousand channels, and not just three, the sport has struggled to survive.

The 1985 Top 20 Snooker Players: 1 Steve Davis 2 Cliff Thorburn 3 Tony Knowles 4 Dennis Taylor 5 Kirk Stevens 6 Ray Reardon 7 Jimmy White 8 Terry Griffiths 9 Alex Higgins 10 Tony Meo 11 Willie Thorne 12 Eddie Charlton 13 Silvino Francisco 14 David Taylor 15 Doug Mountjoy 16 Joe Johnson 17 Bill Werbeniuk 18 John Parrott 19 John Virgo 20 John Spencer