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06 Sept 2025

Kildare resident charged with assault and criminal damage — against himself

SURPRISING ALLEGATIONS

Kildare resident charged with assault and criminal damage — against himself

File photograph.

A man residing in County Kildare was charged with assault and criminal damage.

However, there is an unusual twist in this tale: the man was charged with committing the offences...against himself.

Judge Desmond Zaidan presided over the case, which was heard at Naas District Court on Thursday, July 4 last.

Gardaí told the judge that the man stood accused of attempting to remove a clamp on his car, which would constitute an alleged criminal damage offence, in County Kildare.

The defendant was also being prosecuted for an alleged assault offence on the same date, which led to a further criminal damage cause, as he had allegedly broken glasses as a result of the alleged assault.

However, the man's solicitor, Tim Kennelly, brought up an interesting point to the judge: the charge sheets for the alleged assault and alleged second criminal damage offences listed his own client as the alleged injured party.

In short, Mr Kennelly's client was charged with committing assault and criminal damage against himself!

This resulted in laughs from court practitioners and others present in the court at the time, as well as the defendant himself.

The judge saw the funny side of the situation, remarking: "I've heard it all now!", which drew laughs from court practitioners and others present in the court at the time, as well as the defendant himself.

A garda told the judge that gardaí were seeking to make an amendment to the two charge sheets.

Judge Zaidan struck out the alleged assault case and second alleged criminal damage case, and adjourned the case concerning the alleged criminal damage to the car clamp to a date in December for hearing.

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