'We always dreamed of having a big family so we fostered a little boy' - Kildare couple

There are currently over 6,000 children in care in Ireland and this figure is growing every day.

Unfortunately, a lot of children in Ireland cannot live with their own family, either on a short-term or long-term basis for various reasons and are therefore brought into State care.

This could be because of illness in the family, the death of a parent, neglect, abuse or violence in the home, or sometimes it can be because the parent or family is not coping and they need respite or long-term help. Foster families are often the safety net for children in those situations; people like Kildare's Shirley Graham and husband Sean Egan.

Ahead of Fostering Awareness Week which commences on March 2nd 2026, the Leinster Leader/Kildare Live interviewed a foster parent who has shared her inspiring story.

Shirley from Kill, Co Kildare and her husband Sean have been married for 20 years and have always dreamed of having a big family. Unfortunately due to health reasons, it wasn't possible.

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Shirley has one biological 13-year-old daughter named Phoebe but decided to grow her family through fostering.

"So we came back from living in the Middle East in April 2023 and we looked at many different avenues and opportunities to increase our family size," Shirley started.

"When we came back to Ireland, fostering just came across our path and we thought we would be an ideal fit.

"We have big hearts and a lovely home and have great family support with our extended family on both sides. We thought it was kind of a nice opportunity for us to explore."

Shirley said that fostering was one of the best decisions she made in her life and told her husband, "God, we should have done this ages ago, or at least explored it."

The Kildare foster mother said that the fostering journey itself takes time and there's a lot of learning, a lot of courses, and a lot of support to of be explored, especially dealing with children from various backgrounds.

"But the journey and the timing makes sense. When you do get approved and a new person comes into your family, you realise the importance of all of those steps of learning a new chapter that you're going to rely on," she explained.

"Because parenthood is not easy, never mind fostering. It's a challenging role for both myself and my husband, but I must say we touch wood so far".

Shirley and her husband are now the proud foster parents to a little boy who arrived to them in April 2024. The boy is now five and a half and is thriving under the care of the Kildare foster parents.

But this change took a lot of adapting, Shirley said, especially for her daughter who was an only child for so long.

Last year, Shirley also took in a newborn baby girl who was in need of an emergency home for four months.

"We opened up our doors to a little child that needed emergency care until they found a long-term placement for her. So we had a little baby here, so again, that was lots of new learning.

"You know, as an older woman, when a newborn comes into the house, there was lots of different changes and sleepless nights. But you know what? You get through it. You know, you have spouse support, you have family support, and you have the support of FFI."

Shirley's daughter also gets support from Fostering First Ireland where she attends fostering sibling group sessions that they run for children who are part of fostering families to help them adapt to the change and new family life.

Pictured above is Shirley Graham-Egan, daughter Phoebe Egan and husband Sean Egan

"There's up days and down days but 99% of the time, it's just busy and brilliant, the two bees and we are very, very lucky."

Shirley's advises anyone interested in fostering to call Jessica at Fostering First Ireland and said "even if it's been a thought or it's a conversation you've had with a partner, definitely explore it.

"Like you're never, ever, ever pushed into a corner. It's just, it's a wonderful journey to be on. and again, it does have its challenges, of course but the support is there that if something goes wrong, FFI are there to pick you up, you know.

"I think if you have a big heart and have a supportive home it's definitely worth it to pick up the phone and explore the options and at least have that conversation with somebody who knows the ins and outs of what fostering involves.

"Life is busy, parenthood is busy, but if you have that space in your heart, it really is worth exploring."

Shirley said that FFI supports her in every aspect of parenthood, like hosting monthly meet-ups for her and other foster parents in Kildare.

"They even concentrate on my well-being and my husband's well-being and make sure we're doing okay and our glasses are full and that we're not being exhausted by the whole experience. 

"We all meet in the Keadeen Hotel the first Tuesday of every month with my link social worker and then other foster parents and that's a lovely couple of hours, like we meet at 11, we have chats, we go through the learning agenda and then it's a very informal conversation  about how people are getting on, how people are supported, have they had any challenges, and it's a safe space, it really is."

If you are interested in fostering a child, you can send an enquiry to www.fosteringfirstireland.ie or call Fostering Advisor Jess directly on 087 9394697.

You can also attend one of their fortnightly information sessions which are held online with fostering advisors and experienced foster carers.

Fostering First Ireland's criteria to be able to foster a child is as follows: 

- You need to be over the age of twenty-five, there is no upper age with fostering you just need to be in good health and have a reliable support network around you.- You should have a spare bedroom available, foster children can not share with your own children.- If you have children, your youngest should be at least 3 years old. You do not need children to foster.- You should have your full driving licence, there are a lot of appointments that come up for children in care so it is important that you can travel to and from them.

"Fostering is the most amazing rewarding journey you will ever experience, one piece of advice that our foster carers would always give is to just get going and try not to think too much about making that call. You are always supported by professionals and never alone once you get started you will not look back," Fostering First Ireland said.